When I was in 6th grade there was a boy in my glass named Darren Musto. I have a very poor memory yet somehow I will forever remember this kids name. Like most girls, I met puberty much sooner than the boys in my class and for me this meant being about 2 feet taller then most of them. I also developed hips, tits, and ass much younger as I was blessed to have the family chubby gene. This kid Darren would stand behind me in the hallway as we piled into class and mutter the word ‘AMAZON’ in my ear. At the time I had no idea what it meant but it didn’t sound pleasing. I wanted so badly to be shorter that I would often stand hunched over with both kneecaps bent in a vain attempt to appear shorter. When I look back on my adolescent pictures now I simply look like I had some type of physical defect. Ah those were the awkward days of puberty. Fuck em. As I grew older I discovered the origin of this word. Amazon: a notably tall, physically strong or strong willed woman. I am 5’11. Yes I am tall and yes I am chubby. It didn’t take long for me to appreciate what this meant. In our society tits come in very handy. As John Waters once wrote 'the first thing a woman learns is that tits are a weapon, if you’ve got em stick em out.’ I then began to notice that much of my teenage years were spent in pursuit of getting other girls into bed that had these assets. I appreciated all body types, yet there was something more enticing to me about girls with a little extra junk in their trunk. I also have a phobia of bones, which may contribute to picking those partners I intended on sleeping with to have extra padding. To me nothing is sexier then a voluptuous woman confident in her body type and willing to show it off without the fear of being judged, ridiculed, or harassed. About four years ago my depression soared and I began to doubt everything beautiful about my body. I found my weight to be my enemy, my tits and ass too big, my age too old, and in general I was just fat. I found myself hating skinny girls because it appeared to be what everyone found attractive. The fact is I can never be skinny, small, or young. I am not a girl who giggles or asks questions I know the answers to to make other people feel smart, yet I found myself contemplating these horrific acts. I started therapy, worked on and continue working through these challenges and now think fuck it. I am not an advocate of American plastic surgery and view the act as another component to the hyper capitalism fear of death oppression and expectations women in this society fall victim to. So, I squatted and out came the egg that cracked open into chubby pigeon. I want to have a place to display what I think beauty is. I wanted to have a spot where I can share my political ideologies, sexual explorations, pigeon adventures, and display my fetish for beautiful chubby women wearing ornate hats. As women in this society we are exploited, pitted against each other, oppressed, and are given a list of unattainable expectations by men who hold over us an ideal that I would never want to fuck. So here it is, Chubby Pigeon, welcome to my nest.

Who I Am